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tellshannon815Title: Let Me Stop For A Bit, This Is My Greatest Hit
Characters: Claire, Jack, Sawyer.
Pairings: Jack/Sawyer (Claire/Charlie)
Rating: PG
Warnings: Totally AU from the end of S3
Summary: For![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
hitlikehammers who requested "Greatest Hits" at ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
lostsquee Summer Luau. In an AU where Claire gets the message from Charlie and reads it out at his memorial, Jack and Sawyer reflect on what they would write if they ever tried to write such a list.
Claire wasn’t usually one for long speeches. Usually, she left that sort of thing to Jack. But it was different today.
This one was for Charlie.
“I tried to think of something to say to you all today,” Claire began, “but then I realised, today is about Charlie. I’m not going to give you some big speech that I wrote; instead, I’m going to read you the message he left with Desmond before he died. It’s about what he considered to be the five best moments of his life:
Number 5: The first time I heard myself on the radio.
Number 4: Dad teaching me to swim at Butlins.
Number 3: The Christmas Liam gave me the ring.
Number 2: Woman at Covent Garden calls me a hero.
Number 1: The day I met you.”
Claire swallowed hard as she paused to let the words sink in, glancing at the DriveSHAFT ring which she now wore on her own finger.
“Well, that woman at Covent Garden was right,” she continued as Sayid nodded. “Charlie was a hero. In the end, he sacrificed his own life for all of us. So when the rescue boat arrives, remember that he’s the reason we’ll all be on there.
“Charlie achieved so much in his life. Sure, he was well-known for his time in DriveSHAFT,” she paused as a couple of people smiled to themselves, remembering how he’d told them all about it as soon as they’d all arrived there, “but a lot of the things on this list are simple things. They’re about spending time with family, about his friends. And Charlie understood before he swam down to the Looking Glass station that they’re what’s important in life. Without family and friends, we’re nothing at all. So we should all remember that as we prepare to leave this place. It’s the simple things in life that should make us proud.”
Jack thought about Claire’s speech for a long time afterwards, wondering what would be on his list if he’d ever tried to write one like Charlie’s.
Graduation day, that would have been on there. The day he’d walked onto the stage to accept his certificate, the only person to graduate a year ahead of his class, scanning the crowd for a familiar face. And there they had all been; Margo, clapping wildly, wearing that awful hat she’d bought specially for the occasion. His girlfriend of the time, Emily; his best friend, Marc. And the face he’d been seeking out the whole time; his father, Christian.
As Christian had got to his feet, clapping harder than anyone, Jack knew he had achieved what he had previously thought impossible; he had made his father proud of him.
And the day he’d fixed Sarah; certainly at one time, that would have been right up there. Now, of course, remembering that made him think of everything else that went with Sarah; the infidelity, the accusations, that confrontation with his father.
But there had still been the sense of achievement after having successfully performed the operation he hadn’t thought was possible, after seeing Sarah’s face when she realised she could wiggle her toes, that she’d be able to dance at her wedding.
Or how about the first spinal surgery he’d performed successfully? Yes, that was a possibility, but even then, it was tempered with the memory of how Christian had forced him to take a time-out in front of everyone, of the feeling that once again he hadn’t lived up to his father’s expectations, of how the frustration he’d felt when he couldn’t even work the damn vending machine had just about summed up his mood.
But maybe Jack’s greatest hit was yet to come. He had managed to make contact with Naomi’s freighter; when the boat arrived, it would get them all off the island. And once Jack had successfully got all his friends rescued, maybe that would be the greatest moment of his life.
Although Jack hadn’t known it, Sawyer had been watching him as he’d tried to come up with his own list. Hell, he’d thought sourly as he glanced over in Jack’s direction again, if it had been him, some poor sucker would probably be still reading his list now.
Whereas in Sawyer’s case, it would probably be easier to write a list of Greatest Screw-ups. What had he ever done in his life that he could be proud of? Having walked away from conning that son of a bitch once he’d realised he had a kid, making sure that kid never ended up like him? Well, maybe, but there was no getting away from the fact that the life he’d chosen had led him down that path in the first place, and if he’d never seen the kid, he’d have just taken the sucker’s money anyway.
Or what about Cassidy? Even as he’d begun to wonder if he was developing feelings for her, Sawyer had always known he was going to go through with the con. A tiger don’t change its stripes. He’d taken the money, tried to ignore the feeling that it was a hollow victory, the thoughts of how things might have been if he’d chosen Cassidy instead.
And what about Clementine? Now, there might have been a chance for him to have added something to the list. Or maybe not. Who was he kidding? He wasn’t father material. What was he supposed to do with a kid anyway? She was probably better off without him, and he sure wasn’t ready to be a father to her. So why couldn’t Sawyer shake the feeling that his failure to be part of Clementine’s life was another of his greatest screw-ups?
And he hadn’t even started on the big one yet. Ever since finishing that letter when Uncle Doug wasn’t looking, Sawyer had always imagined that the greatest moment of his life would be the day when he finally tracked down the original Mr. Sawyer and forced him to read the letter he’d written all those years ago before finally killing him. But that wouldn’t be on his list now. Not after Locke’s father had laughed in his face. “She practically begged me to take her money and rescue her from her sorry little life.”
Sawyer had tried telling himself afterwards that Cooper had just been playing him. Son of a bitch probably ran that con so many times, he hadn’t even remembered who Mary Ford was. But the doubt had remained in his mind; could the memories of his mother, which as recently as a week ago would have been high on his list, have meant nothing at all?
“Something wrong, Sawyer?”
Sawyer glanced up to see that Jack had walked over towards him. “You know what, Doc?” he asked. “You’ve probably got a list as long as your arm. If somebody asked me, I wouldn’t have one goddamn thing to add to my list.”
Jack smiled wryly. “You’d be surprised. I’ve been trying to come up with my list, and I’m not sure I have any more than you. Maybe both of ours are still yet to come.”
Well, what d’you know? Sawyer thought as Jack’s hand brushed his, as they looked into each other’s eyes and knew, in that moment, that they understood each other. Maybe we just both got our greatest hit after all.
Characters: Claire, Jack, Sawyer.
Pairings: Jack/Sawyer (Claire/Charlie)
Rating: PG
Warnings: Totally AU from the end of S3
Summary: For
hitlikehammers who requested "Greatest Hits" at lostsquee Summer Luau. In an AU where Claire gets the message from Charlie and reads it out at his memorial, Jack and Sawyer reflect on what they would write if they ever tried to write such a list.Claire wasn’t usually one for long speeches. Usually, she left that sort of thing to Jack. But it was different today.
This one was for Charlie.
“I tried to think of something to say to you all today,” Claire began, “but then I realised, today is about Charlie. I’m not going to give you some big speech that I wrote; instead, I’m going to read you the message he left with Desmond before he died. It’s about what he considered to be the five best moments of his life:
Number 5: The first time I heard myself on the radio.
Number 4: Dad teaching me to swim at Butlins.
Number 3: The Christmas Liam gave me the ring.
Number 2: Woman at Covent Garden calls me a hero.
Number 1: The day I met you.”
Claire swallowed hard as she paused to let the words sink in, glancing at the DriveSHAFT ring which she now wore on her own finger.
“Well, that woman at Covent Garden was right,” she continued as Sayid nodded. “Charlie was a hero. In the end, he sacrificed his own life for all of us. So when the rescue boat arrives, remember that he’s the reason we’ll all be on there.
“Charlie achieved so much in his life. Sure, he was well-known for his time in DriveSHAFT,” she paused as a couple of people smiled to themselves, remembering how he’d told them all about it as soon as they’d all arrived there, “but a lot of the things on this list are simple things. They’re about spending time with family, about his friends. And Charlie understood before he swam down to the Looking Glass station that they’re what’s important in life. Without family and friends, we’re nothing at all. So we should all remember that as we prepare to leave this place. It’s the simple things in life that should make us proud.”
Jack thought about Claire’s speech for a long time afterwards, wondering what would be on his list if he’d ever tried to write one like Charlie’s.
Graduation day, that would have been on there. The day he’d walked onto the stage to accept his certificate, the only person to graduate a year ahead of his class, scanning the crowd for a familiar face. And there they had all been; Margo, clapping wildly, wearing that awful hat she’d bought specially for the occasion. His girlfriend of the time, Emily; his best friend, Marc. And the face he’d been seeking out the whole time; his father, Christian.
As Christian had got to his feet, clapping harder than anyone, Jack knew he had achieved what he had previously thought impossible; he had made his father proud of him.
And the day he’d fixed Sarah; certainly at one time, that would have been right up there. Now, of course, remembering that made him think of everything else that went with Sarah; the infidelity, the accusations, that confrontation with his father.
But there had still been the sense of achievement after having successfully performed the operation he hadn’t thought was possible, after seeing Sarah’s face when she realised she could wiggle her toes, that she’d be able to dance at her wedding.
Or how about the first spinal surgery he’d performed successfully? Yes, that was a possibility, but even then, it was tempered with the memory of how Christian had forced him to take a time-out in front of everyone, of the feeling that once again he hadn’t lived up to his father’s expectations, of how the frustration he’d felt when he couldn’t even work the damn vending machine had just about summed up his mood.
But maybe Jack’s greatest hit was yet to come. He had managed to make contact with Naomi’s freighter; when the boat arrived, it would get them all off the island. And once Jack had successfully got all his friends rescued, maybe that would be the greatest moment of his life.
Although Jack hadn’t known it, Sawyer had been watching him as he’d tried to come up with his own list. Hell, he’d thought sourly as he glanced over in Jack’s direction again, if it had been him, some poor sucker would probably be still reading his list now.
Whereas in Sawyer’s case, it would probably be easier to write a list of Greatest Screw-ups. What had he ever done in his life that he could be proud of? Having walked away from conning that son of a bitch once he’d realised he had a kid, making sure that kid never ended up like him? Well, maybe, but there was no getting away from the fact that the life he’d chosen had led him down that path in the first place, and if he’d never seen the kid, he’d have just taken the sucker’s money anyway.
Or what about Cassidy? Even as he’d begun to wonder if he was developing feelings for her, Sawyer had always known he was going to go through with the con. A tiger don’t change its stripes. He’d taken the money, tried to ignore the feeling that it was a hollow victory, the thoughts of how things might have been if he’d chosen Cassidy instead.
And what about Clementine? Now, there might have been a chance for him to have added something to the list. Or maybe not. Who was he kidding? He wasn’t father material. What was he supposed to do with a kid anyway? She was probably better off without him, and he sure wasn’t ready to be a father to her. So why couldn’t Sawyer shake the feeling that his failure to be part of Clementine’s life was another of his greatest screw-ups?
And he hadn’t even started on the big one yet. Ever since finishing that letter when Uncle Doug wasn’t looking, Sawyer had always imagined that the greatest moment of his life would be the day when he finally tracked down the original Mr. Sawyer and forced him to read the letter he’d written all those years ago before finally killing him. But that wouldn’t be on his list now. Not after Locke’s father had laughed in his face. “She practically begged me to take her money and rescue her from her sorry little life.”
Sawyer had tried telling himself afterwards that Cooper had just been playing him. Son of a bitch probably ran that con so many times, he hadn’t even remembered who Mary Ford was. But the doubt had remained in his mind; could the memories of his mother, which as recently as a week ago would have been high on his list, have meant nothing at all?
“Something wrong, Sawyer?”
Sawyer glanced up to see that Jack had walked over towards him. “You know what, Doc?” he asked. “You’ve probably got a list as long as your arm. If somebody asked me, I wouldn’t have one goddamn thing to add to my list.”
Jack smiled wryly. “You’d be surprised. I’ve been trying to come up with my list, and I’m not sure I have any more than you. Maybe both of ours are still yet to come.”
Well, what d’you know? Sawyer thought as Jack’s hand brushed his, as they looked into each other’s eyes and knew, in that moment, that they understood each other. Maybe we just both got our greatest hit after all.